The other day someone {I'll do this person a favor and not say who it was} called and asked what I was doing. When I told this person "I'm working" the response was "oh yeah, changing diapers and feeding babies."
Hmmm. Not only is this grossly undervalue what stay-at-home-moms {SAHM} do, it completely undermines the fact that I'm not really a SAHM. I'm a work-at-home-mom {WAHM}. In between the hours of playdates, classes, cooking, tot school, cleaning stuff, I work. I have a boss, deadlines, invoicing, writing, editing that I need to do. I constantly feel pulled between these two worlds -- unsure of where I really fit. And at that second, I happened to be 150 words into a legal article.
Lately, I've found myself envying both SAHMs and working moms. Society has clear expectations for these categories. But, I don't find that to be true of WAHMs. In the age of Pinterest, SAHMs are these amazing, busy, crafting machines -- or at least feel the pressure to be. They have organically fed clean children. They work out. Their houses are clean, and organized, and cute.
Let me say, I understand that's not reality for SAHMs and that they aren't perfect with perfect kids. I'm not trying to define reality, just what society believes is reality.
Then there are working moms. I'm automatically not a working mom -- cause I spend all day with my kid. The end. I find that people assume all I can talk about is babies. Like I don't have a foot in the legal community, like I couldn't possibly understand -- after all I spend my days changing diapers and feeding babies.
So, where does that leave me? Not the SAHM that can do everything. Not a working mom who is relevant and awesome in her field. I feel like I'm in this gray area where people don't really remember that I work, or know what exactly it is I do. I guess I'm just the one that changes diapers, and feeds babies, but I a little bit more rushed and distracted way?
I'm truly grateful for my job. I hate that I have to work, but the reality is I have to work. My job lets me do that and be home. But, I won't lie, I feel stuck in a really weird place in society and I feel even more unsure about why I care so much about how others classify me.
What do you guys think? Any other WAHMs feel this weird pull too?
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